The Adventures of Roscoe Tosscobble Presents: The Oaken Box of Doom Part II: Three Spiders and an Orc OR The Dastardly Drow Dilemma

Editors Note: The following is (supposedly) based on actual events. Roscoe Tosscobble has agreed to let me post tales of his Travels on the condition that I leave them unaltered in any way. Please forgive Roscoe for any spelling or grammar errors, as he is a busy man having many adventures. ~InkLikeUrine

The Oaken Box of Doom Part II: Three Spiders and an Orc OR The Dastardly Drow Dilemma

Having set out on his journey, Roscoe Toscobble (adventurer extraordinaire) was fast approaching the foothills of the giant walk mountains. Whilst enjoying a pleasant ride Roscoe heard the mighty quail of Giant Flying Sand Wyrm. His compatriots felt, rather foolishly, that it was a dragon. Nothing Roscoe said could assuage their fears. Why, just 6 years ago Roscoe had ridden one of the beasts and found them to be quite gentle once you learned where they licked to be scratched (behind the ears). With an inward sigh, lamenting the loss of the serenity in the ride, Roscoe finally gave into the urging of his compatriots to push for a hard ride to the mountains.

Finally having reached the foothills, the Monkey-Monk found a suitable cave for weathering the elements. Thus the party hunkered down for the evening. Weary from the rigors of travel, the party rested whilst the valiant Roscoe Tosscobble kept the first two watches to keep an eye out for danger. During his second watch, being the noted man of danger he is, Roscoe took notice of a large force of Kobolds that had come to secure the box from the party. They fiends had come prepared, with no less than three trolls, two war chiefs, and several footmen. However, once Roscoe woke the party and rushed to intercept the dastardly foes, he quickly became like a leaf on the wind, dashing and deadly, rolling and weaving twix his foes like a whirlwind of death. The Kobolds where short and easy work before his might and finesse.

The next morn, a mighty bridge had been worn away by dastardly stone-rots disease. Upon discovery of the bridge, Roscoe and party set out to find an alternate route. In the ensuing search, the party found a old observation tower with a cave system underneath. Though the caves were free of occupants, it was clear from the bones and dead bodies, that they had been not-so-vacant recently. Moving along to the top of the decrepit forgotten tower Roscoe and company discovered a drow army lying in wait at the base. They issued Roscoe a personal challenge, the fools, and failed to quake in the fear befitting them once learning that Roscoe was their adversary. The pressed the attack, despite Roscoes’ vehement warnings. Using his superior intellect, Roscoe devised a daring escape using 2 barrels of 100 year old ale, some rope, a hole, and some stairs, with just a smidgen of fire included to keep it memorable. Cutting his way to freedom, and smiting the fools who dared impede his path, Roscoe learned the identity of his devious foes, the dreaded Shadowfang! And what’s more, this particular attack was being led by one of their ten nefarious leaders, the Orc Assasin Wormrot Candasin!

Using some ingenuity that the other members of the part seemed to lack, Roscoe managed to  stun and poison the dreaded leader, but not before Leariah was tainted by the mongrels poisoned blade. Upon retrieving the Oaken Box from the noble paladin, she bravely stood at the entrance to the passage way, fighting off three blood spiders to cover the parties escape, letting them disappear into the depths below.

What became of Leariah’s body? Where is the party headed to now? How will they ever reach Anvil from the depths of the earth itself? And when will Roscoe aquire a new trustworty grappling hook? Find out this in more in the next installment of Roscoe Tosscobble, Gentleman Adventurer!

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